In this day and age, many of us are too quick to jump on the whole offense/defense see-saw. It’s tiring. We all have needs and not enough of us are going out there and asking for help with them.
There has been a recent increase over the past couple of years of people starting to put themselves first. While this is great and all, we're also forgetting that we don’t always have to be the hero in our own story, and our story alone. The great thing about movies, books, true crime, whatever escapist media form you are into--is the way that people’s stories always interconnect. Characters will come and go, but they’re always a part of the overriding narrative.
So, why can’t you ask for a little help from others at times, and make yourself available to do the same for others? Putting yourself first sometimes is great, but that shouldn’t be your only way to muddle through life. Here are some of the areas in life where you just need to get over yourself and ask for help.
1) Asking for money (back)
Money is still such a taboo topic. We need it to get the things we need in life, but some people have significantly more of it than others. If they’re generous with what they have and they’re close enough to you to do so- ask them if you’re struggling--as a lot of us are during the pandemic. Lent someone some money and need it back? Just ask! People will often not give something back to you unless you ask for it--sad, but true. Sometimes we wait for far too long to ask for something that we’re owed until it becomes too late to even mention anything. It’s like if you try to return an item you don’t want after the 30 day returns window. Not gonna happen.
Sometimes you need a little extra help from the big guns to get what you’re owed. Like Cannabiz, for example, a company that helps people get money back they are owed from the cannabis industry.
You need back what belongs to you. Get back what you deserve.
2) Help around the house
With everyone at home, it can feel as though you’re the one doing all the work all the time to keep the place clean and semi habitable.
No, you shouldn’t have to ask others to do their bit, to pick up after themselves or to occasionally wash their dishes. But sometimes it’s better to ask calmly before you blow your lid at them because you’ve tripped over their shoes for the sixteenth day in a row.
And no, lamenting loudly about how you do all the work around the house won’t cut it when it comes to dropping hints that you need a hand. You have to be explicit when people don’t understand that living in a mess isn’t an option.
Navigating the world, it’s important to be polite- occasionally. But there are times when politeness goes out of the window- especially when you want to get what you want NOW! So get ballsy and speak your mind nicely because people do want to help others. Sometimes, they just need to be taught or reminded how.