Updated: Sep 26
Confidence is such a difficult thing to achieve nowadays. With the onslaught of social media being so brutal by showing "in your face" how other lives seem so perfect than yours, people are finding it way harder to relate to the climbing beauty standards. Hence, confidence often bottoms out quickly leading to depression, anxiety and low self-esteem.
Gaining confidence isn't always easy, though. Feeling like you matter to yourself is just as hard as feeling like you are enough for other people. It’s for this reason these six tips can come in handy. By the end of them, you should take something away and know how to achieve that WINNING confidence that shines.
1) Stop The Negativity!
Why is it so easy to tell yourself what you’re so bad at and it’s much harder to praise yourself for all the things you’re so good at doing? Because self-critic has been your unconscious programming and it's time to be aware of that! Stop being too hard on yourself. Don't feel bad for self-praising at something you're so great at in the same way you shouldn't feel guilty or make it a secret if you want to book an appointment at Soma Plastic Surgery to fix something you don't like. Look at it this way... pretend you’re advising a friend when you talk to yourself so that you can finally let the negativity go and be more inspiring, uplifting and empowering to your fragile inner child. You deserve it.
2) Act It 'Til You Become It!
You cannot feel more confident until you fake it. Yup, sometimes, we have to lie to our own selves so that we can be our very best version. Sure, the phrase “fake it until you make it” is an old one, but it does work. Act confident even if you don't feel it on the inside at first, and you’ll eventually project a more confident image because your system will adjust with what you keep telling yourself. Okay, just a warning here: Don't max out your credit card to pretend you're rich so that you can manifest it! That's a totally different story!!! Think rich, feel rich and act rich but don't spend like the rich so you don't go on debt!!!
3) Get Uncomfortable!
It sounds counterproductive, but you need to put yourself into uncomfortable situations sometimes if you want to feel more confident about yourself. Things like learning or trying something new, being outside your tried and tested comfort zone, making new acquaintances and networks... these are all uncomfortable because they're not familiar to you which requires more effort. But they teach you something and you become much more open-minded. Knowledge is power and power is confidence. The more you allow yourself to be uncomfortable, the more you’ll be able to overcome your issues, evolve to be better and learn new ways of doing things which yields to a healthier self-esteem.
4) Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy!
Stop comparing your looks and your life to other people. I know it's challenging because of social media but continuing to do so will only deplete your zest for life. Constantly scrolling on other people's "fabulous" profiles is the best way to feel miserable. Hence, go on a social media detox once in awhile and remind yourself that what people put out there are usually just the "happy" times in their lives. You don't really know what the story is behind those curated photographs. There will always be someone richer, smarter, sexier and hotter but that doesn't mean that you aren't valuable as a person. Your story, your life, your blessings are different from anyone else and that's what makes it yours and yours alone. Find confidence in that uniqueness!
5) Stop Wasting Your Own Time!
Time is more important than money because it's something you can never take back. So make sure that you see your time as something important and valuable. Stop procrastinating! Take a look at how you spend or rather INVEST your time and take action. Do you spend too much time browsing aimlessly on social media, gossiping, watching Netflix and lounging around instead of doing the tasks that need to be done? Do you always put off important things thinking you can always just do it later or tomorrow? Investing your time poorly is like investing your money on something that doesn't yield. You don't feel good because you're not achieving the results you desire but rather, you're wasting it. So break the cycle of procrastination and be productive instead. Start by journaling your goals and writing your to-do list and when you finish each one, give yourself a little reward like one tiny square of dark chocolate. That way, you motivate yourself to keep investing your time in the most profitable way.
Photo by: Julie Licari
6) Celebrate The WINS!
It is not conceited or arrogant at all to celebrate yourself when things are going right. The big AND small WINS should always be celebrated if you worked hard to get it. For a change, enjoy your earned success and allow yourself to feel comfortable and confident with it. It may feel comfortable to dwell on the small failures and pick them apart, but it’s only gonna burst your bubble. Instead, learn from them so you get better at handling them next time. Do what will make you learn and grow as a person from every unpleasant experience... and a little self-celebration such as getting a nice cup of ice cream or a relaxing shower when you achieve even the small daily WINS is always going to give you the confidence boost you need to keep moving forward.
Confidence is the preference here - apply every single one of these tips and you can be rest assured that you are on your way to building those confidence levels... one step at a time, one day at a time. Own it, WINNER! Let me know how it works for you. :)